Burdens
by elitemassacre6
Summary: She's always needed them. Needed to be more than just the best friend standing on the outside of the relationship she seemed to be naturally kept out of. Finally, after being in therapy for six months, Quinn's ready to say all of it.


It takes six months of Quinn talking to Dr. Thomas before she calls Santana and Brittany and asks them to come and sit down, talk to her. The things she needs to get off her chest have been hurting her for long enough, and she no longer believe's that she deserves that pain. Not from them, at least. Judy Fabray hugs her daughter and presses a kiss to her forehead.

"It'll be fine, Quinn. I'm just going downtown to have dinner with Hiram and Leroy, so if you need me, i'll be a phone call away." It had taken more than a few joint sessions to begin to heal the rift in the relationship between the Fabray women. But god was it worth it. Quinn no longer felt the need to hide from her mother the things that were going on in her life. Judy'd already met Rachel and her fathers, as well as the rest of the glee club. She'd always thought she didn't need her mother, but Quinn had recently realized how much she had missed her.

"Yea. I just...what if?"

"Listen. Those girls love you, okay? And so do I. I think that's them pulling up outside, so i'm going to head out, but like I've already said, a phone call away." The younger blonde nodded her head as her mother walked out the front door, greeting and then saying farewell to the two girls headed in her house.

"Hey Q! Wait, why do you look so sad?" Quinn suddenly had an armful of Brittany, the girl was squeezing her tight around the midsection. Santana came back into the room through the kitchen, a breadstick hanging from her lips like a cigar, chocolate eyes locked on hazel. The delivery order she'd called in for San and Britt had come in around five minutes before they'd walked in the door.

"I'm not sad, B. Not anymore." She lied. Santana was still staring at her, and Quinn smiled at her honestly. The latina's expression didn't change. The smile slipped off her lips.

"Ooh, you bought us Breadstix? Awesome" A kiss was placed at the corner of her lips before she watched the taller blonde skip off towards the kitchen. The smile it brought up stayed on her lips for longer than it probably shouldv'e.

"Thanks, Q. You didn't have to buy us shrimp. That shit's expensive. Why're you lookin' at me like that?" Quinn shrugged and ran a shaky hand through blonde locks.

"I just haven't seen you out of your uniform in a long time, you know, besides for glee. You look really good." She watches Santana's eyes narrow, a fine, dark brow lifting over deep brown eyes.

"What, you finally ready to stop holding back all your gay?" Quinn can't help but to laugh sort of bitterly, but she nods her head.

"I'm ready to stop holding back a lot of things. But, to answer your question, yea, San, I am." The bread stick falls from the latina's full lips, shattering on the hardwood floor. Quinn grabs it and tosses it in the trash, still waiting for Santana to say something.

"Seriously? Holy shit." Is what she gets. She'll take it. It's not 'fuck off'.

"Yes. That's...that's ok, right?" It's now that Britt shows up, dragging her girlfriend into the kitchen behind her. Quinn follows, patiently waiting for an answer to her question. She's already thinking that she should have been more patient. All of this feels like too soon.

"Of course it's okay, Quinn. So, what's up? Is that what you wanted to talk to us about?" It's Brittany that says this, long arms once again wrapped tight around the shorter of the two blonde's.

"No. I didn't tell you guys, but, for while now, I've been talking to someone. It took a lot of time and effort on my part as well as her's, but I think I know myself a lot better now, and I don't feel the need to lie or hide, or keep things buried so deep anymore. And, there's something that I've tried to ignore for a long time that I feel like I owe to you to explain. So, how about we eat, and then I'll try to explain it to you." Quinn watches as Santana looks away from her and towards her girlfriend, a smile immediately taking over her features. Why does that hurt so bad?

"Why don't you just get the fuck on with it, Q? If you're gonna tell us you're fucking Berry or something we kind of already figured that shit out." Santana spit out venomously. Her anger sudden and overwhelming.

"I'm not with Rachel, Santana. We're just friends. She's been helping me. What I wanted to say...um, is about when we were younger, and you and Britt first started to kiss, and I realized what it was between you... how you felt about each other. I uh-"

"Hold on, what does anything you just said got to do with you in any way?" Quinn looked away, already teary-eyed, barely hearing the 'San, be nice.' Brittany whispered into Santana's ear.

"I just, I always wondered what was wrong with me, you know? Because we always said we were all each other's best friend. The trinity... But I felt like it was Brittana and then just me alone. And I, just, part of what Dr. Thomas is helping me do is dig up all the hurt that I tried to hide away. It always seemed like neither of you ever wanted anything to do with me and it's always hurt me...I don't know what I'm really supposed to do here. But I really do love both of you more than I should and I thought that with the way I use to act maybe you didn't know that? I don't know..." She couldn't talk through her tears anymore, through the nonexistent lump in her throat. Brittany frowns at realizing she had any part in shutting Quinn out of their lives when she should have been an inherent part of it.

Santana lets Brittany's hand slip out of her own as the taller blonde crosses the two yards to wrap her arms around Quinn.

"It's okay, Quinn. It's okay." Quinn opened her eyes, having a hard time seeing through the tears. Santana stood there opposite her, tears in her own eyes, fisted hands shaking visibly. What was she supposed to gain from seeing her like that? What did it mean? Santana probably didn't want her. Why would she...All these thoughts fly through her head as Brittany holds her close, taking as much of the pain away as she could.

"What are you asking for here, Q? 'Cuz we grew up together, I care... about you...but if it's Britt you want, it's not like I fuckin' own her, but the answer is no." Quinn's shoulders shook as the tallest girl in the room whispered in her ear. Letting her know that she loved her, that half the hard work was done. Before finally separating enough to let dark brown and hazel eyes meet.

"It's not like that, Santana. I want...I need both of you. I love you, okay? I love you so fucking much. Please stop looking at me like that and say something...If you don't want me, don't love me, then please just say it. It's not like I thought you would ever want me anyway. I'm sorry. It's fine...I'm fine." She sobbed into her palm, Brittany frowning over at her silent and unmoving girlfriend, subtle anger at her etched over her usually jovial features.

"Didn't you hear what she said? Say something."

"Look I fucking love you too alright. You're like my best friend, always. Like...seriously, Q. But I can't understand you. What are you really saying? What do you fucking want from me right now, Quinn. Just fucking...just say it."

"I just don't want to be on the outside anymore. I want to be apart of it. A part of both of you. I want to...I want to be with both of you. But I understand...I can understand if you don't love me that way. God, it'd be easy see why if you don't. It's okay." Santana looked shocked for a moment, then smiled in that way that Quinn had only ever seen her smile at Britt. She slowly walked forward, taking the blonde's hands in her own and pulling her closer.

"No. No, I love you too Q. I do. I'm sorry for making you cry so much, beautiful. I'm sorry, baby." Brittany wrapped her arms around Quinn from behind.

"It's okay, S. Just...thank you. Both of you. For... for loving me." She was still crying, sobs shaking her frame every few moments. It seemed she couldn't stop. Brittany figured it was just finally letting all of that pain go. She bend down and picked Quinn up heading up the stairs with Santana following behind, Quinn's hand held in her own.

The blond was laid down in her bed and cuddled on both sides. Her eyelids felt heavy, and she finally felt whole. Soft kisses on her lips from each of them is what made her relax, close her eyes, and fall asleep.


End file.
